Opening up

I have been feeling so negative in the past year. I have tried so damn hard not to bring that FULLY here.

I believe that in the pursuit of trying to be positive I have become more withdrawn within myself. So as much as I did/do not want to make this a down and out blog. I am going to be honest with myself and let this take its course here. I know that means you will see more of the bad than usual. That is part of the reason why I have not blogged more regularly. I didn't want to show that negative girl that I have become.

So 2010 begins with me being more real even if it means that I am negative. I will find the real me again...no let me rephrase that, I will find the new person who can deal with what life is throwing at me. I do feel like it is more than one person can really handle.